Wednesday, May 31, 2006

"So can we declare OFTL an official success?"


Hard to believe that it's almost June. Another month has gone by, which means it's time for my monthly Operation Find The Lesbians review:


Lesbians identified for possible tackling: 2
Lesbians tackled: 1
First dates: 1
Lesbians alienated: 1
Straight women kissed: 0
Gay men kissed: 1*

Not bad, not bad at all. I definitely feel a sense of accomplishment especially after April's poor showing and March's damp squib like fizzle. Dennise asks if I'm ready to declare OFTL a success. Call me superstitious, but I don't want to count all my lesbian eggs before they hatch even though things are progressing nicely with Val.

Instead I've decided to switch gears. Operation Lesbian Retention? That sounds like a problem of a personal nature. Operation Keep The Lesbians? That has promise. Operation World Lesbian Domination? That glint of gay megalomania does appeal to my Scorpio nature. But how about Operation Stock My Harem?
Even better!

While we're casting our sights nostalgically over the last six months, let me point you to the very first OFTL entry. Oh it seems like yesterday that I sadly proclaimed that one of my resolutions for 2006 was to have a girlfriend. How quaint.

Lest anyone forget about the girl I unintentionally screwed over (think of it as OFTL collateral damage or friendly fire), AC left Val a slightly cryptic voice mail over the weekend. Something about how she wishes us well and that she will be civil or something when she sees us. I think. The message was hard to understand in some parts when Val played it for me. And I should also say that AC never responded to my mea culpa email.

Can you blame her?

[ January's Update ] [ February's Update -- sort of ] [ March's Update ]
[ April's Update ]

* Mr. Bad Apologies is just so kissable even though he's A Gay. Mind you, this only seems to happen when there's lots of alcohol involved.

4 comments:

Clementine Gallot said...

for your OFTL : go to Nation (40 something st) on a saturday night ?

nycrouge said...

That sounds vaguely familiar -- never have been. On Friday, OFTL will be at Cubbyhole in the West Village.

Clementine Gallot said...

yeah I know this place, it's cool. line to the bathroom is too long though :) I've only been once but a 50 year old polish woman started itting on me and that was the end of it.

Mr. Bad Apologies said...

Yeah, it’s been FIVE days since a Val update. Are you too busy with the uhaul? Cause that's the only conclusion I can draw. The 18yo and I continue to draw closer to have "the conversation," so I can only imagine so are you and Val. The only shortcoming on this end--well, despite his being busy with prom next weekend--is that I have suddenly caught the eye of a sweet jarhead. Yes, a friggin just-out-of-the-service MARINE is now courting me, and we have a surprising amount in common.

Anyway, update your minions! It’s the weekend, so there must be juice!