Monday, March 14, 2005

"Oh my god I can't believe it . . ."

I just wanted a smoothie. I wanted a smoothie because I was hungover and tired. Jamba Juice wasn't making this easy.

Caribbean Passion®? Blueberry Balance™? Tropical Awakening™? I just wanted a freakin' banana and orange smoothie. Every one listed on the menu had like 16 different ingredients, none of which came close the the blessed simplicity of the orange/banana/frozen yogurt combo.

I went for the Caribbean Passion®.

VA, VA, VA, VOOM… Taste the passionate flavors of the Caribbean and set your cares free! Thank the goodness of Jamba-kissed tropical fruits for giving you more than 100% RDI of vitamin C along with natural fiber for digestion and weight maintenance, as well as vitamin B2 which is essential for the conversion of carbohydrates into energy.

Ingredients: passionfruit-mango juice blend, orange sherbet, frozen strawberries, frozen peaches, ice.

Clerk: "Do you want a free boost?"

A what? Obviously I wasn't part of the smoothie drinking cognoscenti. Will this "boost" make me not hungover? I wanted to ask but didn't. I passed on the "free boost."

Four dollars poorer and 440 calories fatter, I regretted my smoothie choice. My cares were not set free as they promised. In fact today has been rather boring and tedious since I've had no email in my inbox.


Anyone else sensing some injustice? How must I entertain myself today? Clearly by writing crap blog entries about smoothies and hangovers.

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