Wednesday, June 04, 2008

"Honey, why would you buy something like that?"

Back during the summer of 2005 there was a microtrend (fad?) in New York City where women wore Indian inspired sequined tunics. They were all over the place from high end stores to Old Navy. Maybe it was the warm weather or the bright colors the lightweight tunic came in -- or that I had managed to sip from the Kool-Aid cup of bad fashion -- but I decided that I too wanted to partake in this trend. And while shopping at a Lord & Taylor in Chicago, I found one that was about $60 on sale.

When I got my purchase home to New York and put it one one morning, the illusion and excitement began to fade. I'll admit that I'm a woman of some size. So why, for the love of God, I thought it was a good idea to purchase an item that looked like a BeDazzler shat all over me was a mystery. Was I looking for the wrong kind of attention?? My spangly tunic seemed gaudier than it did when I tried it on in the store and the look was definitely not daytime appropriate. Actually not appropriate period. Unfortunately I had hastily removed the tags and it was too late to return.

The poor item sat in my closet, unloved, until last night when Ms. K watched me sort through old clothes, weeding out candidates for donation.

"What is that?"

I looked away from the closet and saw Ms. K pointing to the spangly tunic, which was surreptitiously folded under a couple of shirts.

The look on her face suggested amusement.

"It was an idea gone bad," I replied and sought to bury the evidence deeper in the give-away pile.

"Oh no, you will be modeling that!"

I gave her a cheap thrill and put it on, noticing that the tunic was more snug then I last remembered.

"Honey, why would you buy something like that?"

"Because I knew a future girlfriend would be making fun of it three years later. That's why."

The fun didn't stop there.

"Okay, now I want to try it on!" she demanded.

She put on the spangly tunic and I swear to God she looked like the cutest thing ever. I gave her my big yenta Gucci sunglasses to put on and told her we were ready for shuffleboard in Boca. And then I took this picture.


S said...

Ms. K is quite attractive, although, for some strange reason I envisioned her as a blond.

Anonymous said...

She's totally hot. Brunettes are better.

Anonymous said...

I envisioned her with shorter hair and a little butchier. I don't know why...

Dylan said...

She looks really cute in it. She should totally bring back the fad!