"I just want something . . . something for nothing."

I wish salad bars came with an automatic cut off limit. Some scale or electronic device that sat nearby where I can put my plastic container on and it will say, "Hey, what you got there is way over your $3 limit. Put the tofu back because it's mostly water anyway." And I would go, "I want the tofu. How about I put a few of the asparagus back?"

What I really wanted today was some vegetables, an antidote to the parade of crap I ate and drank this weekend. The good thing about salad bars, is that there are so many vegetable options to gorge on. The bad thing is that before you know it, you've slogged over a pound of food into your ample plastic container. And the thing is that I didn't realize I'd just bought more food than I really needed. That epiphany came after I paid the $5.64 and was sitting at my desk wondering how the hell I thought I could eat six stalks of asparagus, two sushi rolls, a wedge of tofu, and a mess of cold greens and bamboo shoots? Needless to say I am very full right now.

Next time I will get the smaller container.