Wednesday, May 28, 2008

"Ladies, can I ask you a question?"

Thick.

In British English it can mean dim witted. In American English it mostly refers to the girth of something, perhaps a steak. In American slang, thick is an adjective used to describe a woman who has meat on her bones in all the right places, specifically the bootay.

A couple days ago Ms. K and I were crossing Bedford Avenue just as a man rode up on a bicycle. He slowed down as we approached, which I initially thought was because he didn't want to run us over. But then he opened his mouth to speak.

"Ladies, can I ask you a question?"

Crap. Normally I don't engage weird bike riding strangers in conversation, especially since I had a good idea about his angle, but I hoped that perhaps he was lost and was looking for some friendly directions.

"Uh, yeah," I responded as he looked directly at me.

"Is your thick friend single?"

For a moment I was confused . . . and possibly offended as a woman generally never wants to hear herself described as thick. But then I remembered that in some circles thick is a complement. Was he referring to Ms. K? Probably not as she is a little thing and I'm the one with the badonkadonk.

I laughed nervously and answered, "No, I'm not single."

He looked disappointed. "Lucky guy," he said before riding away.

We walked off and laughed off the encounter. I playfully punched Ms. K in the arm. "Hey honey, you're a lucky guy."

But I'm the gay lady that attracts weird guys. Or on the subway. Or at the car wash. Or in cabs.

3 comments:

Sleepy said...

I have a similar problem with the word 'Fag'.
Here, it is a cigarette.
I discovered in New York that informing the Hotel Doorman you are,
"Nipping out for a fag" gets you strange looks.

I also attract 'odd people', old ladies who want to tell me about their varicose veins, nutters on buses and other assorted loonies.

Natazzz said...

I remember one time, this guy telling me he really liked fat chicks....he honestly didn't understand why I wasn't flattered...Good times.

Fab Fierce Femme said...

"Lucky guy"
OMG that is soooo cute.