Sunday, June 12, 2005

"You can always count on me to either fall down or accidentally flash someone."

Reasons why I don't normally wear a skirt:

- I have the ugliest legs known to man (eg: pale, varicose veins).
- Grace is not my middle name.
- With my body shape, everything ends up looking like a tent, an ass tent at that.

Reason why I bought a skirt on Friday:

- It was pretty.

So there you go. I bought a new skirt from Lord & Taylor -- knee length, très en vogue, and sparkles sewn onto it. And I proudly wore new skirt when I went to the beach with Holly on Saturday (ugly legs be damned). Unfortunately new skirt wearing did not come without some embarrassment. Remember that grace is not my middle name?

Right-to. I wore the skirt to Holly's place in Bed-Stuy. Blah blah blah . . . we walked to this cafe to get lunch before departing for the beach and it must be said that I should not parade around public with a skirt on. No sooner were we at the corner by her house did I have two older ladies swooping down around me, yanking on my skirt. Apparently the tote bag slung over my shoulder was causing the skirt to hike up in the back. Great. Not only am conspicuously the only white girl in a quarter mile radius, I am now the white girl with her skirt hiked up in the back. Fab-u-lous.

This is why my ass is a menace to society.


Anonymous said...

Hey, at least you didn't fall down and land with your skirt over your head!


Dennise said...

Wahahahahahahaha . . .
(points and laughs) :D

Oh, I mean, poor thing. How embarrassing.

nycrouge said...

I knew I could count on your sympathy, Dennise.

Mr. Bad Apologies said...

What beach is that!? Very post-industrial.

nycrouge said...

That would be the sunny, tropical, post-industrial Rockaway Beach in Queens.

I miss Delaware.