"Nothing should be allowed to shatter the magical monkey shoe image."

Two tales of horror to relate.

One, which I have to admit reveling in a little, is that I have totally reached Bar Regular status. Yes, this is a little sad, but part of me secretly enjoyed having my name shouted out when I entered my local pub. And when a particular section of stools cleared up not too long after I arrived, the bartender said I could move down to "my seat." Oh crap. I am Norm from Cheers. Not sure if this is a good thing, but the bartender reassured me that I am nowhere near "sad bar regular" status that some people have achieved. Phew.

The second tale of horror, which is related to beer in a way, is that I caught a picture of myself on Flickr while looking at someone else's photos of the Mermaid Parade. So yes, scanned a crowd shot and saw my fat beer paunch sticking out. Holy shit! This is worse than the ass crisis! Now this is where I admit to not visiting the gym since early June. I would include a link to said offending photo but my anonymity is the last shred that my very tattered dignity is holding on to.